Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
17 year olds will be the death of me.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
He better not be in your backpack
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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