addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
