he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
