I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
operation harelip BJ is a go
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
