Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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