His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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