i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
