if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My feet surprised me
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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