Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
