Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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