I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
