waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Randomize
