Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
