is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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