What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
