I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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