smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
There's a naked man in my car right now.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
