And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
