I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You know, be my cock's hype man.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
