I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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