yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
