just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize