My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Randomize
