TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
