North Korea, Best Korea!
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Also, beer. Big fan.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
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