yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I am naked and annoyed.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
