He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
