I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
