Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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