STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
