yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
