You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
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