no. you can't hotbox the world.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
