bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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