I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Randomize
