i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
