I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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