I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
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