Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
