I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize