i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
