At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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