I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
