Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Randomize
