My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
and she was petting her beer can
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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