Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
