Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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