Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
