I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
