respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
