is your mom at the bar?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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